John Edwards

John Edwards in 2004

The federal prosecutors who are pursuing campaign finance charges against John Edwards better do whatever they can to make sure I’m not selected as a juror. I would tear them apart. It’s not that I’m a fan of Edwards: far from it, actually. I would be hopping mad at being forced to defend him.

Look, Edwards is a phony. He’s always been a phony. Though it’s true he could work a crowd like a rock star, I wasn’t impressed with him when I met him in 2004 (I misjudged his being “tired” for being bored). He became a “champion of the poor” while chilling in his posh mansion in Chapel Hill. He cheated on his dying wife and lied about it. Did the money he got from a donor friend and used to cover up his cheating rise to the level of cheating campaign finance laws? Hardly. Edwards may be a self-centered scumbag but I can easily see him doing the very same thing, finding a rich friend like Bunny Melon to paper over his infidelity, whether or not he was campaigning. It’s not like he was buying votes with the money.

I’m angry at prosecutors for simply keeping this guy’s name in the press. I was sick of hearing about the Edwards a long time ago and now thanks to a dubious, overreaching charge we’re stuck with many more weeks of nauseating coverage.

Please, please can we let this loser fade into obscurity? Please?