One of my first jobs was a part-time position stocking and cashiering at Dart Drug in Sterling, VA. It was a throwaway job in many respects, working for minimum wage with some shady characters and finally quitting after being falsely accused of helping myself to the till. The job was useful in that while working there I once helped track down a killer, but that’s a story for another day.
Most of my coworkers dreaded it but I thought working the register could be fun. I enjoyed the manual dexterity it required. The registers were from the stone-age, though: no back-end database to automatically adjust prices for the week’s sale items. Also, processing credit cards required messy ink pens, carbon-copy charge receipts and hauling out a bulky sliding card imprinter. More than a few of my fingers got pinched running cards through.
Since the credit card process was an entirely manual process it was dog slow. Almost as bad as waiting while someone wrote a check. In fact, it was slower than a check because before we could accept the card, we would have to consult a paper booklet listing fraudulent and canceled credit cards to make sure the presented card hadn’t been flagged. The tiny print in the booklet caused frequent mistakes and made the job that much harder. Its no wonder that con artists like Frank Abagnale Jr. (featured in the movie Catch Me If You Can) stole so much money from such a flimsy, insecure system.
All these scumbag telemarketing calls we’ve been getting has made me wish I had that list of cancelled credit cards. Why, you ask? To use as ammunition against these scumbag telemarketers intent on duping old ladies out of their money. These crooks want a credit card? I’ll give ’em one, only it’ll be one that draws the immediate interest of the authorities. I can think of no quicker way to put the heat on these guys who are screwing people out of their hard-earned money.
Earlier this year, Kelly and I had someone hijack our credit card. (They even purchased Microsoft Vista with it, god forbid! Buying a Microsoft product in my name? This was war!) While it was an inconvenience getting a new card and canceling the auto-pay accounts linked to the old one, the incident provided me with the perfect tool to combat telemarketing creeps: I now own a voided card flagged for fraud! Anyone caught using it will be in instant hot water!
I’m tempted to offer this voided card to the car warranty asshats the next time they call. You want to call me thirty times to get my credit card number? Well, here it is: knock yourself out. But better watch your back because you’ve be owned!
I wonder if there’s a law enforcement/financial group already snaring these idiots that I could join. I would love to make a living tracking them down!