We made it to Panama City this afternoon after a long trek south. Our day started where yesterday’s ended: Commerce, GA, also known as The Athens Exit Off I-85. Traveling today was pretty easy, with Travis snoozing for nice long stretches and Hallie not snoozing but having fun regardless.
We arrived into town about an hour behind my parents and Jeff and Suzie, which isn’t bad for having to stop every few hours to nurse Travis. We managed to roll into the Winn Dixie at the edge of town before Travis began wailing again for his next meal. While Kelly nursed him, Hallie and I grabbed a few grocery items for our stay.
We got to our condominium with no time to spare to get ready for the viewing. Travis finished his lunch while Hallie and I got dressed. We sped across town to my grandmother’s house where the rest of the family was socializing and eating. There were cousins I hadn’t seen in years, all grown up and with family. It was a bit of a shock realizing how long its been since we’d all gotten together.
Most of the rest of the family headed to the funeral home while we scrambled to feed our famished selves. Aunt Nancy tossed me the keys to the house before she headed out the door. We grabbed snacks and packed the kids back into the car.
In spite of Aunt Nancy telling me twice how to get there, I still managed to get us lost. We showed up a half-hour into things, about the time the first set of friends and family were heading out. As Kelly and I chatted with folks, Hallie and Hadley spent their time gleefully chasing each other around the room. It was fun to see the kids enjoying themselves.
I did get a chance to peek in at my grandmother’s casket. There she was, in a peacefully-sleeping pose. Next to the casket was a fantastic picture of her taken on last year’s trip to Ireland. In the picture, she’s all bundled up, her tongue peeking from her mouth and a twinkle in her blue eyes. That twinkle is what I’ll always remember about Grandma.
Way too early in the evening, the kids needed to be put to bed. We wisked them back to the condo, where both pitched their own style of fits: Travis demanding food and Hallie demanding she go home and sleep in her own bed. While Kelly soothed Travis (what did you expect? That I would???), I coaxed Hallie into her bed by reading a couple of familiar stories. Before long, both were sleeping comfortably.
As I gathered our stuff up from Grandma’s house on the way to the funeral home, Hallie innocently told Kelly “we didn’t see Grandma there.” Then on the way, she hopefully said “we might see her again.”
Kelly and I fell silent, not sure what to say. We hadn’t planned how we were going to tell our kids about death and dying. We’d peppered most of our talk about Grandma Ann with little mentions of how she won’t be around anymore, or that she’s gone away, or gone to heaven. At every mention, Hallie gets a quizzical look on her face as she tries to comprehend. So far, we don’t know what might get the point across.
It was because of our this that we chose not to have Hallie see Grandma Ann in her casket. It wouldn’t mean anything to her at this stage in her life. And we certainly wouldn’t want to tell her she’s sleeping, since she’d most likely begin to anxiously try to wake her up. Or she might begin to fear sleeping herself.
Tomorrow’s the funeral, at 2 PM. Then we plan to socialize a bit before heading back to the condo and packing for the long trip home. Our initial plan is to wake up very early on Monday and try to put the whole 560 miles under our belts before bedtime. It may be ambitious, but all of us could use a bit of our normal routine right now.
I may post tomorrow night if I get the chance. If not, see you Monday.
